“OFF”iciating

We’ve probably all played a sport in our lives. We’ve also all probably seen our favorite team get gypped out of a call late in a game that we think have cost us or our team a win. If you’ve ever experienced a bad call, a dumbass ejection, a terrible foul, or a pass interference call stay tuned because I’m going to run you through why sports officiating across 3 major sports leagues are trash and how we can fix terrible officiating. Oh, I’ll also tell you about a fun personal experience that you’ll love.

NFL:

Remember when the NFL had a lockout in 2012 because of the labor dispute over the referees and their pay? THEIR PAY? Yeah I bet your pay does suck because you blow. You simply blow at what should be a not so hard job. You have 7 referees helping you. SEVEN! And you still can’t get the holding or pass interference call right that I can see from my living room. That lockout lasted until week 3 of the 2012 season until Roger gave in and eventually paid the cowards after that controversial Packers vs. Seahawks Hill-Mary call on Monday night football. In my opinion, the actual referees wouldn’t have got that call right either. Part time high school P.E. teachers officiated better than the league hired referees. Yeah, another great job Roger. Want to know how to change bad NFL officiating?

1. If they make a bad call… suspend them. If they do it again… fire them. There are plenty of Americans who know the game of football and would love their job.

2. Add more replay to controversial calls. A coach shouldn’t have to throw the challenge flag in order to possibly change the outcome. Get it right at all costs.

3. Fire Goodell. This goes without saying. The NFL commish is a joke. “Not my commissioner.” You all tend to like that phrase now-a-days.

Is your name LeBron? If you answered no to this question, then you most likely will not have a call go your way. Do you play for the Golden State Warriors? If you answered “no” to this question, then you have no shot in winning an NBA championship within the next five years so why do you care anyway? No but on a more serious note, NBA and basketball officiating around the country is just “terrible” (*insert Charles Barkley voice*). You know it, I know it, Adam Silver knows it. The difference between the NBA and any other league though, is that Adam Silver, the commissioner doesn’t hesitate to suspend bad officials without pay. That is what every commissioner across all four major sports leagues needs to do in order to hold these “little league” officials accountable. I am so sick and tired of Lebron and cry baby Draymond Green getting pity calls simply because they go and complain to the official after every whistle. It’s getting out of hand and if you are under 6’3 and block Lebron on a breakaway dunk, I don’t care if you foul him, smack him, tackle him or punch him… it’s not a foul because Lebron is Lebron and he should be playing with Cheeseburger Eddie in the Longest Yard. GTFO of here. Want to know how to change bad NBA officiating?

1. Until Lebron retires… you can’t. He’ll always have the calls go his way.

2. Keep holding officials accountable by suspending them for bad games/calls.

3. Re-iterate what a charge and block is after every weekly meeting. Most people still don’t know the difference and never will.

MLB:

Oh boy, my favorite. First off, did you know that some umpires wore white arm bands because they were getting “bullied” by managers and players? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA IM CRYING IN MY DORM ROOM RIGHT NOW. You PROTESTED by wearing white arm band because you were getting bullied?!?! What a time we live in ladies and gentlemen. You can protest basically anything you want and eventually someone will give in.

*12 year old boy*- “Hey mom, I hate doing homework. I don’t like it. *Mom*- “Well honey, if you protest they have to give in and give you anything you want.”

NO! Stop being a little pansy and do your job like it’s supposed to be done. This isn’t the 6th grade. You can’t say someone is bullying you because of the calls you make in a game and expect someone to feel sorry for you. Suck it up and do your job. You have at least four other umpires out there to help you in the MLB, it isn’t that hard.

And what is it with baseball umpires trying to find something to eject you for? Remember when umpire Gerry Davis ejected Adrian Beltre because he wasn’t warming up in the on deck circle? Lol you have got to be kidding me.

This is why we should go electronic and get rid of every umpire. We have challenges and are able to review everything on video anyway so I don’t see the problem with it. Maybe we have one official on the field just to make sure everything runs smoothly. I don’t know but something needs to change. I’d rather have Hellen Keller calling balls and strikes rather than fat cupcake Joe West. Want to know how to change bad MLB Umpiring?

1. Go Electronic. In the 21st century there is no reason to have MLB umpires. Don’t @ me. (Or actually, @ me so that I can argue with you)

2. Start suspending umpires so that they are held accountable. It’s not hard. You F up a game, you get suspended. Do it again, you get fired. Life sucks then you die.

3. Actually, for entertainment purposes, don’t change. I love seeing fights and arguments between umpires and players/managers. I live for that shit.

My Personal Experience:

Two summers ago I played in a collegiate baseball league down in Myrtle Beach, South Carolina. Before you read anymore just know that I paid money to play in the league. Everyone does and it kind of sucks. Anyway, I wasn’t expecting the umpiring to be very good considering its mid-summer and it’s hot as balls out there and people wanna go home. But this shit was crazy. I’m only going to tell you one story because if I told you all of them we would be here forever.

So this one day we’re scheduled to play a game at 9am on Monday morning. It was an early morning, hot af. We got there at 7:45am and I just wasn’t feeling it that day. We all have those days, I guess. So i’m stuck playing the outfield, most boring place on earth. Of course that day I got like a million balls hit my way because our pitcher sucked. At the end of the first we were losing 8-0. So I get up my first at bat. Pitch 1 was down the middle that I fouled off. Pitch 2 almost hit me, umpire called it a strike. So I’m like well that’s how today’s gonna go. Pitch 3 is a curveball in the other batter’s box, I couldn’t have hit it with a ten-foot pole. Umpire- “Strike 3.” I’m like well damn. I turn around and say “wow, okay we better get that call because that’s ridiculous.” Guy didn’t even look at me as I’m walking back to the dugout.

So I go back to the outfield tired as shit, the other team scores three more runs within the next couple of innings. I get up again in about the fourth inning. Pretty sure we’re getting no hit from this 12 year old kid who eats fruit loops for breakfast and weighs about 90 pounds. I go up there ready to swing at anything because I have a 65 year old geezer behind home plate. Pitch 1 I foul off again. Pitch 2 was a curveball… I’m not shitting you, bounced in the other batters box and I kind of did a flinch check swing but wasn’t even close to going around. Umpire- “Strike 2.” I turn around and ask “wait a minute, did you call that on the pitch or the swing?” Umpire- “On the pitch it crossed the lower half.” At this point I do a big sigh and walk around home plate as I look at my coach shaking my head. Next pitch, I jump out of the way because it legit would have hit me. Of course the Umpire goes “Strike 3.” I stand there, look at the dugout, look back and say “Are you ‘explicit’ serious? That’s ‘explicit’ terrible.” I then walk halfway to the dugout and scream “At least be ‘explicit’ average.” Umpire goes “yeah we’ll see you.”

I found out 2 minutes later that meant I was ejected. If you’re going to eject someone, at least make it emphatic enough so that I know I could go home. Needless to say I left the field by 9:45am and was watching Law and Order in my bed with a big cup of coffee by 10:15am. That was a great day. Moral of the story umpires are awful and not grown men what so ever.

That’s simply a fact! Thanks for reading and don’t forget to follow me on Instagram and Twitter– @jcmoore19 and my new Belly Up Twitter – @JordanBellyUp