I have, what I think, is my best idea so far today. Baseball is America’s past time, sure, but it’s just that – PAST time. So, how do we make baseball great again? Take all the unwritten rules of baseball, write them down, then pass them through the shredder. It’s the tiptoeing around each other that makes this sport so boring to most people under the age of 50. There needs to be a large increase in mid-play trash talk (Looking at you, too, golf) in my opinion. Let’s see how we can make this happen.
Talk About No-Hitters In Progress
OK, so I’m not really sure if this one is exactly necessary. However, I roll my eyes every time I hear someone mention “jinxing” a no-hitter. As if that’s not already the main thing on a pitcher’s mind after retiring 24 straight through 8 innings, even if he could hear you. But let’s take it a step further. Do players chirp an opposing pitcher who’s staring down a perfect game or a no-no? I doubt it. I want to hear it from 10 rows deep in the stands. I would LOVE for some number 8 hitter to come to the plate, two outs away from being no-hit, and mentioning it over and over again to the pitcher as he approaches the hitter’s box. That’s watchable stuff, right there.
Steal Bases In a Big Lead
Steal bases whenever you can. Lead, deficit, tie, 29th inning, I don’t care. Never shy away from stealing a base if you have the confidence and capability to make it happen.
Admire A Home Run
This is literally the best case scenario at the plate most times. As a matter of fact, admire all home runs. Here’s a rule for you. Open dialogue (AKA trash talk) between pitcher and hitter (who just jacked one 8 rows deep) is highly encouraged, however, hitter only has “X” amount of seconds before he reaches 1st, and after that no more talk allowed until crossing home plate. I don’t know, seems like that could be extremely fun for me. Oh, and bat flips are mandatory.
Bunt to Break Up a No-Hitter
Do literally anything you can to break up an opposing no-hitter. I don’t want to see any strings pulled because you “have some respect for that guy out there”. No. Bunt three times in a row if that shit works.
Celebrate A Strikeout
Just like the home run, this is literally your goal at your position. Let out some emotion when you get the job done well. It’s not your fault the guy on the other end didn’t come to the dish with his big boy pants on. Let him know. Let’s do open dialogue encouraged yet again. Yell as much as you want on that mound until the batter who struck out gets to his dugout. It might need some tweaks, but that’s a good baseline.
Well that’s all we have for right now, but this is a good start. We have to get the blood boiling. For how much potential the sport of baseball has to be exciting, it’s shame its so damn boring to watch from beginning to end. And for the people who say that’s not the case, and it’s as exciting right now as it can possibly be, please never invite me to a social function because your standards for fun and excitement are dismal. Probably.
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