Christmas came early for professional goalkeepers everywhere last week, as Lionel Messi and Budweiser teamed up to flex on every single soccer player ever and celebrate Messi’s historic accomplishments with FC Barcelona. On Tuesday, December 22nd, Messi scored his 644th goal playing for FC Barcelona, breaking Pelé’s all-time record for most goals with a single club.
To commemorate such an accomplishment and to show his alpha-male status, Messi and Budweiser custom-made 644 bottles of beers for each of his goals and sent them all to the goalkeepers that allowed them.
Most goals scored for one club. We’ll never see another like him ?
— Budweiser Football (@budfootball) December 22, 2020
Kings aren’t made overnight ? #BeAKing #Messi #KingOfBeers #KingOfFootball pic.twitter.com/d7889tFhmv
644 goals. 644 custom beers. 160 goalkeepers.
— Budweiser Football (@budfootball) December 24, 2020
Leo Messi delivers on the pitch. We deliver off the pitch.
A custom bottle for every goalkeeper.#BeAKing #Messi #KingOfBeers #KingOfFootball pic.twitter.com/hfIwp4lmh3
The Hit List
The biggest winner, or maybe biggest loser depending on how you look at it, of this “give up a goal, win a beer sweepstakes” is Diego Alves. Alves is a former Valencia goalkeeper who conceded 21 goals to Messi during his time playing in La Liga. Personally, if I was Diego Alves, the last thing I want is 21 beers from Lionel Messi. Those bottles would serve as a reminder of how many times he has schooled me on the pitch. Another 14 goalkeepers conceded 10 or more goals to Messi so Alves isn’t the only one who has a rather large cold case of buds heading their way!
The Keeper’s Comments
Some of those who made the infamous list were good sports about it all and took to twitter to congratulate Messi on his achievement.
.@budfootball… thanks for the beers.? I’ll take it as a compliment. ? We have great battles over the years! Congratulations on breaking the 644 record #Messi! it really is an unbelievable achievement. Cheers! #BeAKing #ad pic.twitter.com/Rvz2kSv23B
— Gianluigi Buffon (@gianluigibuffon) December 24, 2020
Congratulations on your great achievement of 644 goals, Leo. I never like conceding but the challenge of stopping you brings the best out of goalkeepers too. Thank you @budfootball for the special gift. #BeAKing #Messi pic.twitter.com/3Nmn9dVycu
— Jan Oblak (@oblakjan) December 24, 2020
Cheers to you Lionel Messi? and your other historical career milestone! Thanks for the gift @budfootball! Brilliant idea! ?#BeAKing pic.twitter.com/v69gNyyzFq
— Tomáš Vaclík (@vaclos31) December 26, 2020
My Hypothesis
I feel like Messi wants these goalkeepers to have drunk fever dreams about him after drinking these. Messi just wants to live in these goalkeepers heads rent free! He might as well have just sent them a DVD with the his goals on repeat so they can at least have something to watch while they cry into their (what looks to be) GALLON SIZED BEER BOTTLES! Could you imagine if Randy Moss sent a fruit basket to every cornerback or safety that he ever snagged over? Or if James Harden sent a bottle of champagne to every player he’s dropped off on the court? That would be unheard of! Kevin Durant’s Twitter burner accounts would be firing on all cylinders if he got a case of James Harden bubbly.
However, I’m sure those bottles would be a hell of an investment. Can you imagine how much bottle number one would sell for in ten years if it was signed by the goalkeeper, Raul Valbuena, and Messi himself? I’m sure the beer would taste terrible by then but it would be a hell of a collectors item.
All jokes aside, Messi is one of the greatest to ever do it. This tremendous accomplishment just goes to show how great of a player he is and how great he has been for the past two decades. This is just yet another historic milestone that can be added to his incredible legacy. Personally, I just wish he would have celebrated it in a less arrogant manner.
