Even when I feel like I won’t have enough material for the weekly post, NBA Twitter always comes through. The normal, creative people that make up that community are endless comedy streams that quickly pull the funny out of the mundane. Especially during the long slog of March, we need them to make us laugh while the tanking and load management intensifies. Before jumping in, check out all the great work being produced on Belly Up NBA including: should the Lakers bench Russ, Ja Morant’s MVP candidacy, and LeBron doing King things.
NBA Twitter Can Teach LeBron How to Lie
lebron hire me to teach you how to lie better https://t.co/T5ZhvXjJEu
— todd bonzalez (@doinkpatrol) March 2, 2022
Athletes have great memories. Athletes can also be some big fibbers. To become as successful as they are in a hypercompetitive world, there are some stories you will tell yourself as motivation. Whether they are discussing themselves, their team, or a memory, they can produce some head-scratching soundbites. Such is life when you have great confidence and a mic constantly in front of you.
LeBron James is no exception and @doinkpatrol was quick to point out that even a great athlete can still get coached up. This particular quote was delivered after a 109-104 loss to the Mavericks on March 1st. You can tell by how over the top LeBron describes what he’s willing to push through, even the King doesn’t fully believe what he’s selling.
Whenever an athlete talks about their head getting chopped off, they are reaching for belief and motivation. I don’t blame LeBron. Even if he believes in his own ability (he dropped 56 four days later), he’s been way too petty since the trade deadline to believe what he is peddling verbally. Not to mention the pandering attempt at the beginning to the ladies of the media. LeBron, take @doinkpatrol’s advice and get some coaching on lying.
Sacramento Kings: New Cut, Same Team
Kings before Sabonis trade: 20-35 (.364)
— LHG (@BlockedByBamba) March 6, 2022
Kings since Sabonis trade: 4-7 (.364) pic.twitter.com/ks9NGGuYtY
When the Sacramento Kings traded for Domantas Sabonis, there was hope in Sactown that he would be the pair with De’Aaron Fox to lead the franchise out of their 16-year malaise. Yes, fans were mad to see Tyrese Haliburton go, but now the Kings had an All-Star. Surely this was going to start an upward trend.
Well, as @BlockedByBamba put in meme form, there has been a fresh lineup for the same stink. Sacramento has the exact same win percentage after the trade as before. Yeah, yeah, we get change doesn’t happen overnight. There is greater work to be done on the roster than this one trade. It will probably take an offseason to actually affect change. But, jokes > facts.
This can’t be what the Kings front office was hoping for, at all. You have to be expecting an uptick in overall play as well as a slightly improved record. Small sample size post-trade be damned, even just one more win to upset the meme. But, alas, this is the Kangz, and they seem determined to never recover from firing Rick Adelman
NBA Twitter Won’t Let Tobias Rest
Ok, look, I don’t want this weekly roundup to pick on particular players in the league. Jokes are funny but they can also get old and stale if you go to the well one too many times. I do, however, have my sensibilities and petty sports dislikes, so if there is a good Tobias Harris joke to be had, I will pounce. I promise, dear reader, to not make this a weekly occurrence.
https://t.co/rg0czptaUR pic.twitter.com/Ox0w5QiARN
— Ho News (@fancytomboy) March 7, 2022
Here, @fancytomboy pulls out the OG Chris Paul reaction gif to Steve Kerr at the height of the Warriors-Rockets rivalry. (Do we call it a rivalry or one-sided feud? Ask the editor @painsworth512.) Anyways, the plea to get behind Tobias should fall on deaf years. Sixers fans might hear a lone cry, but why would this be a rally? Has Tobias done anything to make anyone believe he will heed their cry and play better?
As mentioned last week, Tyrese Maxey seems like the guy who is willfully going to take the mantle as the third scorer for the Sixers. He plays with aggression and force. Harris seems content floating through games. Is the roster built to maximize his talents? No. Should any roster be built that way? Also no. Thus the jokes will flow, sorry man.
Kevon Looney Ripken Stays Playing
When you live in the Bay Area, it becomes somewhat difficult to escape Warriors Twitter. Did I also fall in love with the rise of the Warriors back in the mid-2010s due to stylistic preference? Yes. With that, I follow enough of the characters in that world that I understand the chatter of the fans. And boy are they, rightfully, pissed the Warriors haven’t done anything to address the team’s glaring lack of big men.
Looney pic.twitter.com/ul1p0eWsKJ
— sam esfandiari (@samesfandiari) March 7, 2022
With Draymond Green out for two months now and James Wiseman out forever, the burden in the middle falls on Kevon Looney. He has played every game this season and suited up on Monday with rookie contract and G-League guys. Hence, we get the great @samesfandiari making a Cal Ripken reference for Loon dog.
With Looney taking on the gigantic duo of Nikola Jokic and DeMarcus Cousins, essentially by himself, it’s a wonder how he continues to play. Yes, Draymond is close to returning, but Loon dog has to be running on fumes at this point. How the front office expected him to last this long with no reinforcements almost seems like a punishment for not suiting up his rookie year.
